Who is Your Enemy?

The most disarming form of deceit is not from the stranger across enemy lines, but from the familiar voices and faces. When your so-called well-wishers, supposed benefactors or patrons become foot soldiers in the enemy’s camp, they become something far more dangerous than a declared adversary. They become ghosts in your mind, shadows within your light, termites gnawing at your foundation while pretending to admire your structure.

But the moot point is who the real enemy is? Is it the one who publicly opposes and defames you? Or the one who walks beside you, only to whisper doubts, sow confusion and quietly sabotage your calling under the guise of concern? The former is easier to handle because it declares war openly. You pause, you defend, and try to fight back with grace and decency. The latter, however, wears your colours, speaks your language, and even promises you good— all while slowly bleeding you to death!

This enemy is not always malicious. Sometimes, it’s the insecure friend who can’t bear your growth. Sometimes, it’s the relative who secretly resents your success and your wellbeing. Sometimes, it’s the colleague who masks envy as criticism and hates your refusal to play by the rules of mediocrity. Or it can be a companion who manipulates your self-worth through conditional love. These are not villains in the conventional sense. They are conflicted, broken souls who mistake your light for their shadow.

First, drop the illusion. Just because someone once supported you doesn’t mean they always will. People “evolve”. So do their insecurities and inherent evilness. The friend who cheered for you at your first win may quietly resent your fifth. The mentor who guided you through the storm may feel threatened when you build your own ship. Affection is not always commitment. Familiarity is not always friendship.

Secondly, your gut knows. It always knows. Stop giving the benefit of doubt. Pay attention to the patterns : the missed congratulations, the backhanded compliments, the inexplicable coldness when you succeed or you are happy, and the strange absence when you fall. Observe. Don’t confront. Let people reveal themselves. Truth has a way of slipping through the cracks.

Thirdly, not everyone in your circle is in your corner. Some are just watching. Some are hoping you will fail so they can feel better and rejoice inwardly. Some are attached to your struggle, not your success. The moment you start sensing and understanding, they feel abandoned. Not because you left them, but because you remind them of their deceit and decay.

Forgive yourself for not seeing it sooner. For trusting too much. For believing in the masks. For confusing proximity with purpose. You are not naïve; you are human. And part of being human is learning, again and again; how to recalibrate your circle, how to rewire your trust, how to mourn the living who chose to stab and damage you.

The duplicity of well-wishers cuts deep because it touches the roots of our identity. This quiet betrayal brews not just in distant places, but within families, offices, institutions and political arenas, where faces are familiar but intentions are obscure. We begin to question ourselves: Was I wrong? Was I too much? Did I deserve this? No. You were simply budding in a garden full of rotting thoughts and ugly thorns. Your accomplishments, your authenticity, your refusal to settle—it unsettled others. That’s not your burden. That’s your brilliance.

You rise by refusing to become like them. You rise by refusing to react like them. You rise by guarding your sanity but not closing your heart. You rise by surrounding yourself with those who clap when you win and cry when you fail. You rise by building quietly, ignoring silently and caring sincerely, despite the falseness. Because if you allow deceit to embitter you, they win. But if you use it to become more discerning, more strong, more compassionate, you win.

The real enemy is not always “out there.” Sometimes, it disguises in sham smiles, it hides in hoodwinking handshakes, it dwells in shared memories, and borrows your language. But so what?

Let the enemy hurt you. Let them expose themselves. Let them believe they shook you. And then—live and rise anyway. Because when intention is sincere, purpose is pure and vision is clear, no enemy (masked or unmasked) can destroy what God has destined. You are not alone. You are just being refined. And those who betray you just hand you the gift of clarity.