Real Conservationists!

Come winter and its examination-fever gripping the students all over. Dull looks, long-drawn faces, unkempt hair/beard and absolutely no make-up are the salient characteristics of students these days. Well, going a step ahead, some of them remain absolute WOB’s for days together. Of course, it goes to show their concern for building a bright future and a better tomorrow. Nothing wrong there. In fact, in the process they also save their Dad’s bucks by adhering to WOB (with-out-bath) norm by consuming no soap and no shampoo. They, at the same time, conserve a small amount of petrol utilized in their bikes/cars for roaming all through the academic year. They even conserve mobile and internet bills for their parents, to some extent.

So, it’s just another moving example of conservation of ‘resources’. You have conservation of wildlife; conservation of forests; conservation of Dal-Lake; conservation of water; conservation of power; conservation of fuel and what not. Please add conservation (hoarding) of onions, potatoes and tomatoes also.

Just the other day, one of my friends was explaining to me the nuances of difference between reservation and conservation. “Simple!”, she said, “reservation is a political slogan meant for vote-catching and conservation is a slogan—official, public or individual—meant for ballyhoo and some aggrandizement even though denied vociferously.”

What an ‘eco-friendly’ and ‘environ-aware’ theory she had put before me, even as I was thinking about those fly-by-night activities and promises of their Yo-Yo sponsors who have naturopathy, homeo and herbal methods to tackle every problem. Well, looks like our politico-bureaucratic recipe:

Winter—it’s so cold here.

No problem! Move to Jammu.

Electricity is erratic.

No problem! Don’t use geysers and heat blowers, look at the bulb and that should be enough to warm you up.

But see the dilapidated roads.

No problem! Why should you move in cold? Move to warm areas or remain confined until weather is okay.

O! this public transport, can’t you improve it?

No problem! Winter vacations and Durbar-Move will lighten their load and there will be no overload.

But that garbage is piling up.

No issues! It won’t stink during winters.

And those street dogs?

Ridiculous, you seem ignorant of animal rights.

Then what about rights of humans?

What the hell! Can’t you do anything yourself. After all, we also have a Family-Life.

Says a bureaucratic oldie—“You see these people here have these nagging habit of asking for this and that all the time. Just allow us to have a gala time until “Sheen Galeh Wandeh Chaleh”and then, no problem, we will try to set things right.”

So then, conservation of guts and vocal chords is the name of the game until our Darbaari are back. Lick it or lump it, but that’s it.

Coming back to exams, our students even though they become puritanical conservationists during exam time, are not able to show good results (majority of them). Why? Simple theory! You see they work hard throughout the year in the name of Masti and wiping out their Hasti from Poloview to Palladium. Being virtually on cloud nine, they spend their time mostly in Sapnoo Ki Basti. How come can they remember so many things—there’s so much to assimilate from Friends to Facebook to Insta. And why not? Even Gen Alpha  sings ‘Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara’. Their Hard Disks always brimming. Complete erasure and virus-scanning at such a short notice?! We need to understand their predicament. A complete catch-22 situation!

Tail-Piece

Well, had it not been for the conservation of wildlife and the local self-styled Bishnois our street Salmans and stray Saifs would leave no Chinkara alive. But then, they will, at present, need large doses of Cinkara, especially when the rote learning and other unfair means seem to have somewhat lost that magic-mantra. Bad luck!