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Modern day parenting

The challenge is far more nuanced than we might think it is
10:48 PM Dec 01, 2024 IST | BILAL AHMAD KHANDAY
modern day parenting
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Our children are our real asset because they are the future who will shape our society in the coming years. And if we succeed in providing them quality education which unifies reason and religion, science and spirituality, with appropriate and balanced skills, we have to be optimistic for our bright future. On the contrary if we fail to do so, the coming generations will definitely see the disaster which will be irreparable.

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A holistic education is that which prepares a child to face all life challenges with integrity, patience, wit and wisdom by instilling in him the basic life skills. Previously education was limited to reading, speaking and writing but with the advancement in all spheres of life, taking it from the abyss to the skies. And now equal emphasis is being laid on the life skills which infuse a new vigour in a student besides preparing him for different competitive exams and the allied sectors. Simultaneously we have to teach him the etiquette to balance in different situations because the dividing line is very delicate. If somehow he fails to strike a balance, the results would prove very dangerous.

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The idea struck my mind when I saw two youth, in their early twenties, quite efficient and intelligent in their studies, working tirelessly to extract sand from a river. I stopped and thought that both the guys are from relatively well-off families and also they are currently enrolled in an institution for their studies. How on earth they need to do this job for their pocket money which they could otherwise arrange easily from their family.

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In the evening I enquired from one of their acquaintances and he informed me that these days they are busy routinely in earning some bucks and now they hardly pay any heed to their formal studies. He continued that they have now almost left their studies and they feel that the money they earn make them self reliant and independent. “They don’t need their parental or family intervention or support for their needs and wants”, he added. The information proved very distressing for me as I became restless. Then I realized that parenting for generation Z in this scientifically advanced world is not as easy as it used to be. In this backdrop, the duty of parents and teachers has increased manifold as they have to instill the ‘skills of balancing’ as well, besides other routine skills, into the children. We have to train them how they can balance in different situations and which skills they need to utilize in a proper situation. If they somehow misuse or misplace these skills, their future is definitely at stake.

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The religious preachers, community leaders, social media influencers and motivational speakers have a key role to play in keeping the budding youth on track by trying their best to motivate them with their wit and wisdom, integrity and intelligence, eloquence and expression, content and context in order to have a balanced generation that will lead us to peace and prosperity. If we somehow fail to strike balance, the consequences would prove very fatal.

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So if a student earns some bucks while in studies during his formative years, he has to be properly trained in dealing with the money because quite often ‘self sufficiency’ and financial independence ruins a child if he is not properly monitored and guided.

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On the one hand, earning while learning (being a student) makes him relatively financially independent but on the other hand it somehow makes him to forget his long term dreams and goals. The other positive would be his earnings would ease up his familial pressures and burdens to some extent but on the other hand he gradually learns to bypass his parental decisions in family matters. With the result, he becomes a family head with the passage of time and many a time he sinks the family boat being inadequately experienced.

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So the point is that the freedom which children look for should be given in a phased manner and we have to be genuinely well aware of which degree of freedom we have to give them at what time. Additionally the freedoms should be balancd out with responsibilities.

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