Letter to Ta’eth, my Mouj

My dearest Ta’ethi,

As I remember you on your first death anniversary which falls on 14th of December, I am recalled of so many things. Even though you are not physically with us today, yet your sweetest memories, wisdom, decent upbringing, care and unconditional love, etc will continue to inspire and motivate me for years to come. Memories usually fade when people cross their sixties, but to me its not so. It seems that as if some invisible power has recalled me the entire life’s journey with you like an open book that needs to be written in golden words.

Ta’ethi, I know that you are stationed in heavens. I vividly remember how we buried you before Friday nimaz amid a huge funeral of thousands of people. Soon after your death, you came to my dream and said that there was no electricity, no water, etc. but here (in grave) I have been blessed by Allah (SWT) with all facilities. I would have been just 6 or 7 years old, you said, when I would stick to radio-set at home that was those days the size of an apple box.

I also remember how you would take me everywhere during your service in the school education department. I can’t simply forget having spent my life’s most valuable time with you at Ramhal tehsil of Vilgam, Kupwara where I grew up at Late Mohammad Akbar Sheikh Sahib’s home, known by everyone as Akbar Chacha—a great personality of his time who would sleep with his two barrel guns all the time.

Oh! My mother, I would have been a great trouble to you those days when you took me to Handwara hospital on foot amid heavy snowfall from Ramhal area, just to show me to a Pediatrician having my beloved father, Late Ghulam Ahmad Masoodi all along. I recall you, having told me how that day you and Abba Jan encountered with a lion on way in the forest when nobody was in the sight.

That Golden Jubilee Celebration of Govt. High School, Dangiwacha has laid deep imprints on my mind in which you propelled me to speak in front of two ministers Late Abdul Gani Lone Sahib, then education minister and his deputy Abdul Qayoom Sahib who was minister for State, by presenting a skit “Asse Te Rutt Noker” (We’ve hired a servant) been composed by retired Inspector of Police, Peer Ghulam Nabi Shah, son of Haneef Appa, a dynamic lady from Dangiwacha.

I still recollect, how Dr.Abdul Qayum Shah, the great surgeon of Baramulla district also acted with me in this school stage performance with Gh. Nabi Shah who played the role of a Noker (servant) in it. It was this school drama through which you made me exposed to the wider audience, Mama.

And Ta’ethi, when I was in college at GDC, Sopore; Prof. Ghulam Rasool Bacha sahib, a great visionary and towering personality shifted my stream from Science to Arts with Hindi as one of the subjects. Though back home, Abba Jan was against my stream changing, yet, you didn’t let me feel down and encouraged me to go ahead to excel in Hindi subject.

In JNU, before meeting a great and remarkable teacher, Lt. Prof. Aslam Parvaiz Sahib whom I can’t repay all my life, I recall how you and Abbaji would take care of all my expenses that I met at Delhi during my Post Graduation, M.Phil and PhD in Hindi subject. That all was undoubtedly incredible, oh my dear mother and will take me my whole life to forget.

Before the memory fades, let me remind you that you would sit in Srinagar hardly for 5 or 6 days, and then started missing your neighbors at Dangiwacha. You always rendered city life not fit for yourself where hustle and bustle is much and people don’t even greet back, you said. Mouji, you strongly believed in educating girls and that’s why when you died, some ladies of my age who you had taught to, were crying so bitterly in the tent that they had not simply lost their teacher but their mother. I can’t forget your pivotal role, you played in chiseling me.

Literally, it is because of you, I am what I am today. You never let me down and feel embarrassed during my studies. I really miss you, Ta’ethi and I lack words to express how much it hurts when someone looses a much-loved person and surviving the loss is difficult.

Though you were a diabetic patient, yet, you never believed in sitting idle even after your retirement from service. To you rest was rust, and work worship. I remember Prof. Dr. Hameed Zargar’s words, saying that you were the best patient he had ever seen during his service. Mama, whenever I called you in routine to enquire about you health, you would respond Aze Tchi Mea Ghar Gatchun (I want to go home). But then on the fateful day of 13th December, 2023, at around 9:30 am I got a phone call from my younger brother Javaid Masoodi who said that your health has again deteriorated. But how foolish of me! I didn’t understand the crux of your words, “Azze Tche Mae Ghar Gatchun” (Today, I’ll go home). The home you talked about was your eternal edifice, but I realized it later. And it was on 14th of Dec. that you left for heavenly abode on way to GMC, Baramulla. Innalillahi wa inna ilayhi raji’un. You had a record number of more than ten thousands people in the funeral.

Ta’ethi, from childhood to your departure, my journey with you was incredibly remarkable. Even if you are not today physically with me, yet you guide me from heavens about what is wrong and what is right for me. You were great. I miss you all the more. And on your 1st death anniversary when one year has gone by; it seems just a twinkling of an eye. You will always be remembered for your conservative values, the strong-willed personality and patience. Keep on blessing us from the heavens, Mouji. We need you. Indeed are mothers forever. May Allah (SWT) bestow highest echelons in heaven to you. (Ameen)!

Dr Rafeeq Masoodi, formerly of the Indian Broadcasting Service, retired as Sec. Cultural Academy & ADG, Doordarshan, Srinagar