Legacy of Togetherness

His joint family would serve as an example for the people in the locality in order to keep peace

His name was Haji Mohammad Samad Sheikh, but since he was an elderly figure in the village, everyone had been calling him Samad Joo. He was not only a well-known figure in the village but also in the whole vicinity. His example of heading a large family of thirty members was given with pride everywhere. Samad Joo, also known as Samad Sheikh was married by his father in an early age of 14 years with Haneefa Akther who was a daughter of a rich merchant from Seer Jagir, Sopore.

A famous cricketer of his time, Haji Mohammad Samad Sheikh became Samad Joo with time and Haneefa Akther changed into Haneef Appa. They had seven children, four sons and two daughters. As the time passed by, Samad Joo married his sons and daughters too. Those days early marriages were a trend. People considered it a sin, if somebody did not marry his son or daughter during adolescence. There were only few households in the village living peacefully, and among them Samad Joo’s family was a large one.

In the adjoining villages people quoted Samad Joo as an example. Enshouldering the responsibilities of a joint family at a time when resources were limited was something that never deterred Samad Joo. With his great patience, tolerance and diligence, he helped his family grow in weal and woe.

As the father, so were the sons. For his family Samad Joo would do his best, and to God leave the rest. As the time went by, his sons started following the footprints of his hard-working father. They worked day in and day out like their father and with each day by day made their whole family stronger. Having stopped their exemplary father work any further, be it in the fields or elsewhere; they kept his reputation of heading a joint family always up.

The only task, Samad Joo had to do was to oversee the entire family of sons, daughters-in-law and a battalion of children. No body would dare to do anything without seeking his due consent. Doing anything without informing in well in advance was against the norms of the family. This was probably what had made the Sheikh family stand out at all times.

Today’s hard work is tomorrow’s reward. Every day, Samad Joo’s sons would wake up early morning, offer prayers and like an early bird leave their home to catch the prey. The eldest son, Ghulam Mohammad Sheikh, lovingly called as Gul To’ath in the vicinity was a Tangaban. Another son was Ghulam Rasool Sheikh, Resh To’ath who was the only baker in the locality. Third son who was running a shop in the nearby village was Mohammad Sultan Sheikh. Since, he was a shopkeeper. Everyone had been calling him Sulh Kiryane. However, the fourth one was Mohammad Jamal Sheikh whose only duty was to look after the whole family in absence of his brothers.

All the four sons of Samad Joo have had their own families too. However, the largest family was that of Mohammad Sultan Sheikh, Sulh To’ath. It was a family of eight members with four daughters and two sons. And the families of rest of Samad Joo’s sons did not exceed six family members. Families within a family of Sheikh’s had fetched a different image to Samad Joo. His joint family would serve as an example for the people in the locality in order to keep peace.

Every day, Samad Joo’s sons would seek their parents’ permission and leave to attend their respective occupations. Except Ghulam Rasool, the only baker who had to leave towards his shop; soon after having offered the Fajr prayers in the village mosque. Because he had to keep bread ready for his customers in the wee hours. Samad Joo’s family was not only the biggest joint family in the area but every member of his family was hardworking, patient, dedicated and honest. Except for some kids, everyone in his family would get up early, and then get themselves busy in their daily work.

Going to the fields together, and helping each other back home would not only divide the labor of Sheikh family but it also fostered the bond of love, mutual respect, understanding, brotherhood and peace.

One day, a village Numendar Gaffar Lone came to Samad Joo’s house. While smoking Hookah, they stirred a short conversation regarding different issues pertaining to them. Talking about his daughter, Fareed’s harassments at her in-laws, Gaffar Lone said, “Samad Joo, your family too has grown bigger. I think you too should now allow your sons to live with their families separately.”

“Nobody has stopped my sons to live singly with their families. At least, I have never restrained them in doing so”, replied Samad Joo. But this suggestion deep inside not only pierced him like an arrow, but he took it as his sons’ indirect proposal for him.

That evening, when all his sons had returned from their day’s hectic work, and sat in front of their father as usual to relax. Samad Joo while smoking hookah said towards his eldest son Ghulam Mohammad Sheikh, whom everyone called Gul To’ath, “ Gulla, do you want to live with your families, separately? Today, Gaffar Lone had come here who talked about allowing all of you to live individually with your own families.”

“You all are here. Tell me, who among you want to remain separately with his family? I have not stopped you.” Samad Joo said further with a tinge of annoyance in his voice. These words of Samad Joo, startled all his sons sitting around. The issue which they had not even thought about gave them goose bumps. Everyone justified himself to his father that at least he has not talked about it with Gaffar Lone.

“Look, my dears”, said their father, so sympathetically. “I have no issue with your separate living. You have full liberality from my side to live individually with your own families. And I know your families have grown up. But if you will remain disjointedly with you families, you’ll feel insecure and weak. People will find happiness in finding you struggling in the quagmire of life’s convolutions,” Samad Joo, further added.

“We have no intention to live separately, oh my father”, said the eldest son Ghulam Mohammad. “Yes, yes! We haven’t thought of such an evil thing”, said other sons in order to assure their father that they have not thought of living individually with their families.

Throughout that night, Samad Joo didn’t have a wink of sleep. He tossed and turned over in bed because he was unable to sleep brooding over Gaffar Lone’s suggestion of dividing his own family that he has ruled like a kingdom over decades.

One morning, while returning from Masjid, no sooner Samad Joo reached the last steps of the house stair than he slipped and got injured very badly. His sons took their unconscious father instantly and rushed to the district hospital for immediate treatment. But, alas! It was too late. Doctors declared him brought dead. His sons were thunderstruck, and wept so bitterly. Their father’s sudden death was for them a bolt from the blue. They cursed themselves, and for years after his death, they felt that he was the greatest defence and security for them who had taught them to live in union, always!

(The story is true but the names have been changed)

 Dr Rafeeq Masoodi is former ADG Doordarshan & Secretary Cultural Academy, Srinagar