Don’t wait until they are gone!

I belong to that generation of kids who did not have mobile phones to spend hours on in their childhood. To all those people who belong to that generation would really find this article relatable. That time was quite a beautiful time because our childhood was peaceful. The life we lived was simple. We were not taught values but we imbibed them by watching our elders do what was right. Human relationships were real. There was pure love, care and affection in each and every relationship. We were Alhamdulillah quite blessed to have maternal and paternal grandparents who would pamper us.

We were mostly taken care of by grandparents. Back then we were a joint family. The ratio of nuclear family was very less to joint family. Our grandparents could never see us crying. They would do anything for our happiness but at the same time would never turn us into spoiled kids. I would so love watching my elders especially my grandparents offering Salah. I would imitate my grandfather while he was praying Salah. When I was a child, he would often take me along to masjid and I would enjoy spending time with him. He would take me to his office too and explain to me various things which he knew I was able to understand at that age. While my grandfather was busy giving us worldly exposure of how life works, my grandmother had an equal role to play. She would take me along wherever she would go most of the times. And I would then get to know who our acquaintances were.

Our elders would teach us and we would listen to them. Unlike today’s generation who are all the time on mobile phones and they get to learn almost everything digitally. We haven’t been brought up by mobile phones, thankfully! Our elders have a great role to play. We were connected to our parents but we were equally, in fact, more connected to our grandparents. I remember my grandmother would feed us by her own hands before leaving for school. And I cannot ever forget the essence of her hands. Our grandfather would make us write cheques for him. They have tolerated all sorts of tantrums from us. They have loved us beyond our thinking. They would never let us eat street food, junk food. They have always been over protective about our health.

We used to watch them do what they would do and that is how we acquired their values and wisdom. We have always been grateful to have their guidance in our lives. It is quite hard for today’s generation to understand such emotional connect. It is not even their mistake but the digitalisation that has taken over for the past several years. They lack such emotional connect. Even though, they go through all the love, affection but the technology comes in between and builds that wall which hinders that emotional connect.

While growing up, our grandparents would narrate us tales of our childhood and even now. They would share with us the stories of their childhood and how marriages used to happen back then. They would share how life used to be back in their era and compare it with the current life. We would get to learn so much from them. They would have such beautiful relationships with people, be with relatives, friendships or just people in the neighborhood. Their circle was quite big but also valuable. They would teach us about trust, loyalty and kindness. They valued human relationships. They would live such a simple yet a dignified life.

I remember my grandfather had made an audio recording of our childhood and we would often ask him to play that for us. He still has that with him. My grandfather is a keeper. He believes in keeping record of anything that is worth memorable. He would play that recording for us, get emotional and would recall everything from that recording as if that must have happened a day before.

It is a blessing to have them in your life. It becomes our responsibility, mine and yours whomsoever is reading this article and could relate to it, to take care of them as they would take care of us in our childhood. It is us who they need now to hold their hands and watch their steps. I request everyone reading this to not treat your elders as a burden.

Think of the times, when you were growing up in your initial years and they would carry you on their shoulders not complaining but taking care of you. They need you more than you need them in your lives. As we grow up being adults, we tend to forget what they have done for us when we were too young to understand anything. Think of the times, when they would never even think of hurting you, then how can you hurt them now when they need nothing but your presence and your attention.

By the time, we realize it, it is too late; either they are gone or they are not in that position to witness that. So, be with them. Spend time with them. Be grateful for having them. Respect them enough. Listen to their never ending tales. They have so much wisdom. Earn their duas. Treat them with a smiling face and a loving heart. They always have some advice hidden in whatever they tell you, so hear them with interest. They are the foundation of your home. And you realize it, when they are already gone. Don’t keep regrets for later. Pray for them.

I lost my dearest Dadi, and Nani in the past 9 months. It feels like yesterday. They were gems of their times. There is not a single day when I don’t either talk about them or miss them. May Allah grant them Jannat ul Firdaus and to everyone who has left for heavenly abode, Aameen!

By: Sana Khurshid