Are the children alright?

A few days ago, NCERT released the findings of its 2025 survey on mental health among students. The numbers from Jammu and Kashmir revealed a grim and concerning reality: 33% of students reported being teased, 29% felt excluded by their peers, 38% were ridiculed by their classmates, and 13% reported not feeling safe at school. The data begs the question: Are the children alright?

Today’s children are growing up amidst unique pressures that the previous generation did not have to face. This is not to diminish previous struggles but to recognise that these children are not weaker than those before them; they are more vulnerable. They grow up surrounded by relentless consumerism, instant comparison through social media, and a pressure to excel both academically and socially. We marvel at them navigating apps effortlessly, but forget that their minds are still developing.

The limits of their age still exist, while they are being exposed to the world more than ever before, with barely any safeguards. Anecdotal evidence highlights that belonging and friendship among peers are increasingly being tied to owning the latest phone, the trendy clothes, or the ornate stationery, with a clear message: to fit in, you must have more and make sure that others know too. Yet, there is little to no conversation with them about inclusion, equity, accepting diversity, and showing kindness towards their peers, perhaps because these are lessons the adults responsible for them are also still learning.

In many urban homes in Kashmir, a unique situation exists - our children grow up in an environment that is both nurturing and neglectful. They are loved deeply, yet rarely understood. They are pampered with amenities, yet rarely heard. When a child raises a concern about feeling anxious, seems withdrawn, or becomes aggressive, many of us tend to dismiss them, insisting the child is ‘spoiled’, drawing comparisons with our own childhood, and adding that mental health is perhaps not as important as scoring well in exams or being well-behaved. How often do we truly take them seriously and look deeper, not only into what they are saying, but also into what they are avoiding? What may seem trivial to us as adults could, in reality, be something shaking them to their core.

Children are the collective responsibility of any society. Parents, guardians, and schools need to work together to build a safer ecosystem. Compassion and empathy must replace discipline practices rooted in shaming or fear, which often heighten anxiety rather than nurture growth. Schools need robust child protection policies, open discussions on bullying and peer pressure, and safe, confidential mechanisms for students to report concerns without fear of retaliation. At the same time, parents need to equip themselves with the tools, awareness, and patience to understand mental health, recognise early signs of distress, and truly listen to their children.

While love and care at home are essential, they cannot replace the expertise and structure provided by trained professionals and institutional safeguards. The NCERT survey also highlighted the gaps in our systems - 22% of schools lacked an anti-bullying policy, 12% had no POSH guidelines, 8% were not POCSO-compliant, and 4% had no discipline policy at all.

Without these safeguards, children remain vulnerable to bullying, ridicule, and the long-term consequences of growing up without support systems.

It is about time that schools invest in mental health specialists and counsellors, skilled in trauma-informed care and committed to creating equitable, safe spaces. Such interventions can serve as a vital bridge between children, families, and teachers, helping young people adapt to the social and emotional demands of today’s world, regulate their emotions more effectively, and communicate with greater ease. One model worth looking at is the Delhi government’s Happiness Curriculum, launched in 2018, which reached 800,000 students through daily 40-minute sessions on mindfulness, storytelling, and empathy. This low-cost, adaptable programme built resilience without exams or textbooks, strengthened teacher–student bonds, and normalised conversations about challenges, failure, and recovery. It underscored that mental health support is not only about crisis intervention, but also about crisis prevention.

The NCERT numbers from Jammu and Kashmir validate what we already know - the needs and challenges of children have evolved. It is time that the adults around them also understand this reality and invest in caring for their minds, not just their marks.

Azra Gul Qaisar, an independent consultant working in the areas of gender, public health, and child rights.