A tradition that needs to end

The dowry system has ancient roots. In earlier times, dowry was given by the bride's family as a form of inheritance or financial support for the daughter when she left her parental home after marriage. It was never meant to be a burden, but rather a way to ensure the woman’s well-being in her new home.

Why was it given?

Originally, dowry served to help the bride settle into her new life, providing her with personal belongings - jewelry, and sometimes property or wealth. In many societies, it also compensated for the fact that women often had limited rights to inherit family property directly.

How it transferred into a social evil?

Over time, this tradition slowly transformed into a harmful practice. As families began to use dowry as a way to show status or gain wealth, it turned into a form of transaction. Sons were seen as a way to acquire dowry, and daughters became financial burdens. In many cases, parents of brides are forced to fulfill large dowry demands from the groom’s side, leading to financial pressure, loans, and even bankruptcy.

How it is practiced in Kashmir?

In Kashmir, dowry remains an accepted and expected practice, even though it is illegal under the Dowry Prohibition Act of 1961. In Kashmir, dowry demands are disguised as “gifts” or “parents’ happiness,” but the social pressure remains very real. Many weddings are delayed or canceled because the bride’s family cannot meet dowry expectations. Often, families spend huge amounts on lavish weddings to gain honour and social status, which further adds to the burden. It has now become similar to the time of British colonial rule, when ideas were often spread by first targeting the upper class, and then the lower class would follow.

It keeps weddings on hold.

Because of these financial demands, many young women in Kashmir and across India are unable to marry. Parents struggle to gather the resources, while young men and their families demand more and more. This results in stress, broken engagements, and sometimes, lifelong suffering for young women.

Let’s get civilized.

It is time for society to wake up and realize that marriage is not a business deal. The value of a human being should not be measured by money or property. Laws alone cannot solve this problem — only when people change their thinking will dowry finally disappear. Let’s promote simple weddings, equality, and respect for all.

Anisa Anjum, student B.A Hons., Geography.

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The value of a human being should not be measured by money or property.